Friends Of STAR

Being fifty plus, even for a car will come with some rusty and creaky parts. An oak tree at fifty plus however, is young and considered still green! You and I, dear brothers of batch 75, are neither cars nor oak trees – we are some fortunate beings who have been there and done that~! Parts of us are rusty and creaky and there are parts of us which are still youthful and full of life! Which parts? The answer my brothers, depends on which parts you have abused and which you have looked after well. Hahahaha.

Being fifty plus comes with some God given perks too. A few of us are already Datuks, and I am not talking about the honourable Dato Hamzah here. The like of Ir Pian, for example has been a Datuk for a couple of years already. Then, there is the immunity we get for not remembering wives' birthdays or our wedding anniversaries – for fifty plus men are expected to be forgetful. Even, the sound of our snore is regarded as most comforting by our wives – it reassures them we are still breathing!

One night I was awoken by a gentle brushing of my wife's palm against my nostril, and when I asked what was she doing her reply was, "Checking, because I did not hear you snoring!"

I like it when strangers expressed awe and surprise upon knowing my true age! "Oh you look much younger than that !" they would say, and I grin ear to ear soaking in the flattery every time. It is a nice preoccupation in thinking and making resolutions to try to be healthy; doing the odd exercise, sleeping early, eating health food, etc etc. Being STAR Old Boys, we are well known for our ability to think and plan for what the right things to do are...! Our short coming is in the area of discipline execution of those thoughts and plans. Hence, I am still trying to try out my diet and exercise plans which I have promised myself some ten months ago! In the mean time, I have gained 12kg and growing!

Often, as a fifty plus man, people would pause on their own words to listen to our wisdom. Yes, we have been there and done that – we have scars on our face as proves. Give us problems to solve, we will break down what seemingly complex issues into small pieces, and simply love giving our advise. Don't call us old fashioned if our wise words are not the same as the answers provided by google 'How to....' searches. Ours are deep, profound advise based on tested and proven method. After all we have 'makan garam' much earlier than the time those computer nerds come up with their 'googled' solutions.

There is one downside. It probably is best illustrated by what happened to one of our friends at a hotel he was staying while on business travel overseas. One day, he was pacing the corridor of his floor when in front of him was a gorgeous blue eyed blonde with a pair of perky D-cups to boast. Being a bit of a 'buaya and a charmer' as he was passing the lady he had his elbow brushing against the lady's bossom. "Excuse me, if your heart is as soft as your D-cup, then you would forgive me" He said, smiling cheekily. The lady responded, "Oh well, if your penis is as hard as your elbow, my room number is 212!"

Although he ought to, our friend was not elated! It was soon after his fiftieth birthday when he noticed that his was no longer able to be as hard as anything!

Being fifty plus, we are hero at teasing and flirting – but zero at performing~!

However, the nicest thing of being fifty plus, in my view is waking up each morning! Another day being alive. Yet, another day when our borrowed time is being extended.

Now, how is life treating you these days? Tell us your stories...